Today’s self care post comes from a different space. Yesterday’s post above was about working through challenges to do nice things; my neon green manicure is still bringing me so much joy today 🙂
Today’s overall theme was giving myself grace. This morning I woke up and needed extra time than I had planned to make my way to work. I caught myself feeling frustrated about not being on time, and had to catch myself to breathe and calm down. I got myself a nice coffee and was gentle with myself arriving a few minutes late to work. I did get to go out for lunch with my coworkers which, as tired as I was, I am so happy I went to because it made my day! It was so nice to just be able to spend time with the girls in a less stress setting and just relax. I was also very proud that I pushed myself to go out because often times it’s just much easier to head home and be alone.
Another moment around giving grace came in the car on the drive up North (I was not driving don’t worry)! I ended up crying and feeling extremely burnt out, and my wife was a sweet angel who gave me some compassion and also some tough love. For the last year I’ve been convinced that I am an undiagnosed autistic because of the learning I’ve done for my clients. But sometimes, I get frustrated with myself for things that I help my autistic clients with, like regulating their emotions and applying energy conservation principles to their lives.
She reminded me that I am not making up the challenges I have. That there are lots of signs that point towards me struggling with things and symptoms that relate to autism. Sometimes I feel like I just have so much empathy and love and compassion for others and I’m missing that self compassion piece…. And although it’s a practice I’m working on, I feel like sometimes I lack patience for myself.
This is not a post of pity or attention seeking or sadness but a reflective post about how sometimes self care isn’t cute and fun but can be hard. It can be taking your anxiety meds for the first time in weeks, drinking water when you don’t want to because the taste is bothering you, or eating when your appetite is very low or non existent. Self care is ugly sometimes, but it’s important to remind ourselves that we’re worth the tough work. I’m worth it, you’re worth it, and we ALL need to work on that sometimes ❤️
This is a reflective post for me to think and find routine and structure and support again… but I hope this can also be relatable for at least one person too 🙂 I am thankful for my wife who truly sees me. You are seen too
Ideas for tomorrow:
Tomorrow is supposed to be a rainy day, and we’ll be up North with my in laws and their dogs…. So while my wife works I may do some work, potentially work on some passion projects, but I’ll DEFINITELY be reading and napping with the dogs! This is going to be my day to reset completely and I hope to practice more self compassion and grace with myself ❤️
Be Your Own Sunshine 